When a person faced traumatic experience or during mid life crisis, when their hormones are unstable. For males, it is gradual, and for females, the process is fast. One can miss many things in their life, but like death, it is a certainty.
Does everybody face the difficulty? This is where your personality type, family situation and work environment play a crucial part.
From my observation, females who are type A personalities(they are more competitive), who have narcissists in their family or who face a tough work environment, face it severely.
Why?
Before midlife when cortisol levels increase, your body can handle it. But during hormone cocktail times, your body becomes weak. And your body produces the same cortisol spikes even when you are calm. And it starts to affect the body parts. The hormone spikes have the ability to make your first language as your second and vice versa. lol. You would have seen the world with one perspective, and now you get the 360-degree view. And it changes you. You won't be the same person again. This is how a people pleaser became a narcissist slayer.
In this duration, if you develop awareness, the integration will be good. Otherwise, you can become a bitter or cunning person. Though Carl Jung said this as integration of the shadow, I call it as integration of feminine and masculine energy. You will be surprised by your new identity. It is similar to marriage. You give equal(!) rights. I gave 100% rights to my masculine power and changed my personality. Once you get used to the new power, start to integrate both. These things will take years.
The women who succeed this duration have created history in their careers and their personal lives.
At the same time, I have seen people destroying their marriage without knowing they are changing.
Don't destroy anything; understand you are changing.
The world, you can see it now with a new lens, eyes and experience it differently.
