From rags to riches...

 This story is simple. All you need is rumors.  😊

I always wonder why people spread rumours? What will they get from it? And I found the answer recently. In Maths, using a Venn diagram, we solve problems. I used it to find the answer.

Intersection and difference in Venn diagram concepts helped in finding the solution.

Mainly, I used the process of elimination(difference). I observed the specimen for 1.6 years. lol(I refer narcissist like that).

It started casually. One of my neighbours asked for my help, and I helped. Then it started. The rumours about my career. I was confused. I did not understand. Why? After all, I helped. It is not wrong. I tried to fit in. I tried to please as a people pleaser. It did not work.

Then I started to observe my specimen. I did not talk much; I simply observed. And the neighbour asked for my help regularly. I did it. I love bombed and made my neighbour understand that I know what work she is doing. This process needed a lot of patience and waiting time.

Around this time, another rumour spread that I am wealthy. I was still confused.

I stopped all communication, and the process of elimination gave the result. Voila - found the answer. The only communication between the neighbour and me was her asking for my help regularly.

We are nearing the conclusion. lol. It is simple. 

When a narcissist needs something from a person, they create an illusion that the other person is weak and that they are the one who needs the narcissist. Narcissists try to tame the other person so that they can control them by spreading rumour, manipulations, guilt-tripping, gaslighting, etc.

Now I said I can not help further. This time, the reaction will be different. I have already made the narcissist weak. Now I expect the rumour like, she is arrogant which I like.

I made the narcissist look like a fool by making her to spread a rumour opposite to the previous one. Poor, rich and arrogant. Oh my God, it is entirely different from the 1st one. lol.

Life gives us the same problem again and again till we gain knowledge to overcome it. It took me all these years to understand it.

Thanks to my specimen, I have the data points and solutions. 

This is how a people pleaser became a narcissist slayer. 😇

All you need is a narcissist to become "rags to riches". lol.

Peacock University & the learning...

 Last year, when I joined Peacock University, I had a few expectations. And now, after a year, when I review my expectations, I can say it is fulfilled. 

I learned about myself, and more psychological concepts and especially about narcissist which made me a narcissist slayer. 😇

I thought students from the same city would complete the course. But it looks like a few did not attend the exams. As per my understanding, mid-aged students will complete or try to attend all the semester as attending classes will give them some relief from their routine, boring life. 

Students in their 20s and 30s will give importance to their job and will give the course less importance.

But my neighbour and her friend will attend all the semesters due to their family situation. After all, even narcissists need some time away from their family. I understand their pain, lol

Distance education in psychology attracts mostly narcissists as they want to learn how to get hold of the empaths. In the middle age, the people around narcissists gain experience to escape from them, and it will frustrate the narcissist. They will get confused, like, why does nobody admire me nowadays?

Am I supporting a narcissist?! lol 

Marriages and divorces...

 In life, we take many things and relationships for granted. We don't choose parents or family. But we choose our life partners in this generation. Since this change is new, the previous generation doesn't know how to guide their children. In many situations, parents become the reason for the separation between couples.

A few years ago, I was watching an interview on YT by a female doctor. She is cute, and she has her own YT channel. She has a huge fan base because of her way of talking. Clear, bold and very casual. The interviewer was asking about her husband and the Dr was mentioning him very casually without respect. At that time, I thought that marriage wouldn't work.

A few days before, the same Dr, divorced, a little bit depressed, hurt as she did not expect divorce to happen to her. This is what every successful person faces when they experience it. Why me? I am talented!!

She married her school friend, and since they are friends, developed a habit of addressing each other without respect. This type of behaviour should change after marriage. The world will respect a person if the wife shows respect for her husband and vice versa. And when there is no respect, certain people who want to destroy their happiness can use a strategy and move things according to it.

The chemistry that will be in the start of the marriage won't be there after a few years. It should be replaced with "respect" for the marriage to sustain. During midlife, some people will get separated as they will become entirely different people.

Celebrity people who get divorced, most of the time don't get another marriage, another chance, unless they heal from their past relationship. A few years after the divorce, they will act as if they are happy, and then the acting will also be gone.

There is no perfect person. And expecting perfection from the spouse is foolish. As the human life span has increased, if you are okay with being alone, then expect a perfect spouse. Otherwise, be grateful and happy for the entertainment your spouse provides, which includes fights and misunderstandings.

Some grow apart, a few become narcissists, other than that, I think people should take real efforts to sustain what they have.

As time passes, you will change, your spouse will change, and you are dealing with an evolving human which will make life interesting. Nothing will be boring in it.

This is Devilish Angel. Your family counsellor.😇 You can share your problems in comments. lol.