Walking with Umbrella...

 Only very few people noticed the fire dust yesterday.  I was one of the few to notice it, and mostly I was the one who found comfort in wearing an old, comfortable dress. Sometimes wearing an old dress gives comfort and secured feeling.

The climate is hot from the morning itself. And I saw the married lady coming to the temple with an umbrella. Looks like an evening walk is better than a morning walk, or I have to go for a walk earlier in the morning.

This weekend I am going to write about marriage and the expectations...

It is from my observations by seeing the interview by few actors...

Fire dust and ash...

 I stepped out of the house in the evening as usual. And I noted a few things. There were white color ashes. Outside my house, I saw the ashes of a paper. I was surprised. I thought may be anybody in the neighbourhood burnt something. I was irritated by that thought. Why people are this stupid?

I continued to walk. And I saw the same white-coloured ash. Suddenly I felt as if I were walking near the volcano ash. Then I recollected that there is no volcano near my place. I walked nearly one km, and there was white ash. 

I started to buy things in shops. I heard a village lady complaining that her neighbour was burning waste things, and ash came all the way to her. lol.

I enquired with a shopkeeper. And he said there was a fire in a paper mill which was nearly 10 km away. He called the fire service to find out the reason, and they have given them the reason.

It was an ordinary day for many. But for the people who worked in that paper mill, everything has changed. Their lives took a complete turn today.

But changes bring growth. It happens for us to grow.

How I am going to become a devotee...

 People become devotees when their wishes are fulfilled or when they believe their wishes will come true when God bless them with boons.

I visit the temple during my morning walk to practise a contented smile while seeing God's face. I smile at him. lol. I light a lamp in the temple once a week. So the other devotees in the temple started to think I was a devotee. 

I  say hello to the old lady and a married lady usually. The married lady told me about a powerful song to sing for God. When talking to her, I understood that her native language is different from mine, but she is trying to sing the song, which is written in my native language.

I checked the song. Wow, it is full of tongue twisters. Writing a song with a grammatical rhyme is not easy. When listening to or singing it, I found that my brain's neurons are firing.

Now my family members will think that I have become a devotee. lol.

This is how I am becoming a devotee in others' eyes.

Only God can tell whether I am a devotee or not.

Coffee at Coffee day...

Yesterday I had the urge to have coffee at Coffee Day.  I don't know whether we have a Coffee Day shop in this city. I like the ambience in Coffee shops. It will feel like life is moving slowly inside the Coffee Shop. People will be relaxed and have Coffee without hurry.

Good ambience, cool climate, coffee, and nothing to do at that moment relax the mind like anything. Have you tried it?

Peacock University...

 Peacock University's results for the 1st semester were announced last week. Those who are already studying another degree at that University got pass mark and first marks. Students who bully others or create problems in class also got pass marks. Divorced ladies got grace marks too.

lol. Very predictable pattern.

2nd semester venue has changed. It will be conducted in another college; the number of classes has been reduced to half. Most probably, classes will be conducted by other college faculty. Peacock University professors have created a good(!) name, and it is one of the major reasons for stopping online classes.

My lovely neighbour got pass marks. I dont know why she is silent. Usually she create a scene and share photos in students group when submitting record and assignment.

Once I saw a potential in friendship with her. But within few interactions, I understood she is a stupid narcissist. Then I started to see her as a practice piece. And now she is not even a practise piece. lol.

Universities should create courses for the bored mid age people. It will become a good business and lot of people will attend it. 

Limitations...

 It was one of the fascinating observations I have made about myself. Once we shrink ourselves from certain things, it is not easy to go back to the normal stage.

Once I had fans for my dress and looks. Since I started working from home, my sense of dressing has become zero. And now my brain is stuck at some price level. Above that price level, my brain doesn't allow me to buy it. 

After trying to change my brain for a year, I accepted the fact that I can dress well in low budget. lol.

But the stitching cost went up in one year. Writing about the stitching cost, I understood the limitations of my tailor.

My tailor expects I will become fat and stitches the dress loose. Then I will have to alter it properly.  I have given my new dress for the 3rd time to be altered. It is making me tired. Instead of feeling joy when wearing a new dress, I have to find where to alter. lol. Sad story.

Anyway, I can write a series about my new clothes.

I think the tailor wants to work and stitch the dress loose lol

Opposite house

 Last year, at the same time, I was looking at the opposite house, which was being constructed that time. After construction, I got disappointed as it needed more time to maintain it, and I lost interest. To live in a spacious, good-looking house is on my wish list. 

The people who rented that house were very energetic in the beginning in maintaining the house. And nowadays they understand they are stupid to rent that house. lol

They acted as if they are the only rich people in the whole area at first, and now they feel they are the poor among us. lol.

To feel rich or poor is in the mindset.

The lady in the house doesn't talk to anybody. But watch what kolam I put daily. Every day she comes near the door to watch my dress when I go out for a walk.

Why doesn't she talk to anybody? I have my imagination.

She is the 2nd wife, and it is not her son in the house. It may be the 1st wife's son. That is the reason. lol.

I can not verify my imagination though.

 

The life coach...

 A few days ago, I was watching YT videos. One of the owners of an established bakery was giving an interview. Born in a village but went abroad after marriage and is now running a business successfully with her husband. I was impressed with the interview. I even watched it twice. The topic was general about life, marriage, husband, wife etc.

Since she went abroad and met people from different cultures, her knowledge was good. Her exposure to different people is more extensive, which resulted in a very good interview.

That one interview made her famous. She got another interview soon, and the title said she is a life coach. lol. Seeing the positive response for the 1st interview made her start a new business, "Life Coach".

2nd interview disappointed me. When talking about divorce, she was saying females are acting without maturity; their parents did not advise them properly. All divorce disputes can be solved if husband and wife talk over coffee(!!!!)

Her husband giving her equal or more rights does not mean the whole world is like that. She is talking from her experience, and it won't be suitable for all.

For personal problems, you can not give a common solution. Every individual's environment is different. Their personality is different.

Her intelligence was diminishing in each interview.  Usually, a person's talking style and intelligence won't deviate this much. I don't know why(Unless everything is scripted and written by somebody else to establish her as a life coach).

Life coach--- a disappointment.

A rare real story - Part 3 The true freedom

 I saw the old lady today. I can see the remarkable changes in her. Her face was more relaxed, as if she had got rid of the things that burdened her. Like always we exchanged few words with smile. Usually she would wear a scarf-like cloth to cover her neck.  Today it was not there. Then I understood.

Last time when I saw her, when she told me that she is single and never married, she removed her neck scarf and showed the chain she was wearing. From the chain a female wear, we can understand whether they are married or not. She looked at my face when she said she is single. I dont know what emotion my eyes showed, but I already know she don't have a husband. 

When I saw her today, I understood one thing. To avoid the society's trolling, she has never showed the world she is single. She covers her neck when she comes out. Last time, she saw my reaction, which encouraged her to show the world who she is. 

It is not like I changed her. She wanted to change herself and she has selected me to take the bold step.

I can not imagine how it will be to feel guilty for your existence, to feel guilty for being single, to shrink yourself infront of others.

She will be around 75 to 80, I really appreciate her bold move, to uncover her mask, to show the world who she is. To tell the world she is single and it is not her fault.

At any age a person can take a bold step. At any age a person can get rid of their pain.

First time I was seeing a person separating themselves from the pain they are carrying their full life.

It is good to see that, though it is an emotional thing for me. 

She got the real freedom now.

A rare real life story - Part 2

 You can read part 1 here.

The sacrifice

The promise

Freedom

Unknown sacrifice

A person who is sacrificed in the family won't understand they are the victim. Rather, they think they are helping their family and taking care of the family. But I can see a person in the past, present and future. A human being has the ability to justify what they did. Her family should have created an illusion that she is a dull, mad person and they are doing her favour by keeping her with them. This can result in isolation from the world, reduce confidence, and she should have believed there is something wrong with her. Only God wll know her sacrifice and the world and her family should have treated her bad.

And I thought, if there is a hell, I would get a job to fry these kind of people in oil pot.

The Promise

And she said to me, in a worried tone, you should marry a good guy. I replied, saying, whatever comes, I can face it. "Ego" is what kills love between 2 people. My brother's daughter married her colleague, but got divorced because of ego.  She touched my hand and said, it is very important for you to understand: you should not allow ego to come between you and your husband. The way she said it was like she was very sure of it. I can understand the urgency and seriousness in her voice. And with the same seriousness, I said I won't allow ego between me and my husband.  My voice sounds like a promise. 

Everybody needs a life partner. And life is meaningless without a partner, she said.

This is the strangest experience I've had recently. lol. 

The freedom

All her life she is living with her brother and her brother's wife is very rude it seems.  Whenever there is a fight old lady will think about going to an old-age home. Though I wanted to move out badly, it still remains as a dream she said.

Why she took time to say all these?

I can understand it. She is searching for an old-age home, and she can move out there any time. That is why she talked about all these things.

After all, she wants freedom.

Whether I will meet her again, or will meet her a few times, depends on when she joins an old-age home. Though she did not say that to me, I can predict she will do that.

Unicorns when they don't know who they are, will die thinking they are a defective human.

Her story made me upset, but I know collective consciousness will her and take care of her.